A Story of Dung and Sneakers

21432727-black-sneakers-isolated-on-a-white-background--with-clipping-pathPhilippians 3:8 “I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ. . .”

Dung! It conjurs an unmistakable image of a pile of. . .well. . . you know. Sometimes we can cling so tight to the earthly, we don’t see it for the dung it is.

How we like our dung!!

I’m reminded of a story.

Several years ago. . .all right it was quite a few years ago, I was probably somewhere around fourteen, I had a favorite pair of sneakers. This was before the day of fancy athletic shoes. These were plain old converse sneakers. I wore them all the time. They were with me when I ran that first mile in gym class. They were with me for a lot of milestones in my life. Then they started to wear out. Sob! As a matter of fact, a large tear formed on the side. It ran from my big toe area down towards my heel; a good six or seven inches long. If I wasn’t careful, my foot woud fall out when I was walking.

My mother hated those sneaks. She was probably afraid of what people would think when they saw me wearing them. “The poor Peters’ family can’t afford new sneakers.” But that wasn’t the case. They were my favorites. Who cares if my foot fell out when I walked. I thought of them as a conversation piece.

I wasn’t going to get rid of them.

One day (it was a Sunday), I was wearing my good Sunday-go-to-church shoes. But when I came home and I looked for my beloved sneakers, I discovered they were gone! My mom had gotten my sister and her boyfriend to drive to the next town over and dump them in a garbage pail somewhere in the downtown area.

But my love for my sneaks transcended town lines. I rode my bike down there and searched through the trash recepticles, one can at a time, until I found them.

Hey! Don’t judge me. I was a stupid kid.

You should have seen the look on my mom’s face when I walked back into the house with them. It was not a look of happiness.

I had to finally give in though, and start wearing new footwear. It was a sad day. I enshrined my sneaks in a box in my closet, vowing to hold on to them for eternity– tell stories to future children of the adventures we’d had together.

Somehow, over the years, I’ve lost track of my sneakers. They probably got thrown out a long time ago. Why not? They were trash. I guess I matured; grew up and realized what was treasure and what was trash.

Alot of us are like this with our possessions; even with false beliefs, power, and position. We hold tight to them like they’re the greatest things in our lives. We place them on a higher level than they deserve. In the grand scheme of things, you need to see your ripped sneakers, or whatever it is that you cling to, as the garbage–as the dung heap of life– compared to Jesus!

Read the verse again. Do you count all you own as loss, as dung, for the cause of Jesus Christ?

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Facing the Music. My Weight Loss Journey

imagesThis is a blog of my quest to lose fifty pounds by Christmas. Feel free to subscribe to my blog and receive notifications when I post.

I’ve been putting off this post since Saturday. . .my weigh-in day. I can’t avoid it. I didn’t do well.

I gained weight.

I’d like to use the excuse that I plateaued or my metabolism slowed or I didn’t realize French fries had so many calories. These would all be lies. I am responsible for my actions. Last week I made some bad choices and I’m paying for it. It was stupid.

There’s a verse in Romans that comes to mind- 7:15 “For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do.”

When I overheat, or don’t exercise, I can always come up with a reasonable sounding excuse. . .That’s what it is; an excuse. I know what’s right to do, but I still do wrong.

I almost didn’t post, figuring I could hide behind silence. But that wouldn’t be right. If I’m going to get your congrats when I lose, I need to stand up and face the music when I fail.

I covet all your prayers, and welcome your advice. Keep praying that next weigh-in will be better.

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He’s Greater Than I Can Imagine!

Ephesians 3:20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 21 to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

I have an overactive imagination. A blessing and a curse. A blessing because creativity is a wonderful gift. To be able to imagine worlds beyond this one, and create them in word, is a fantastic blessing that I thank God for every day! It’s a curse when it gets out of control. Try going for a walk in the dark woods, imagining all types of creature lurking behind each tree and bush. Try going for a swim and wondering if there are sharks down below your legs (and that’s in a pool).

Yes, I have an overactive imagination. That’s why the above mentioned verse is sooooo great. “To Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine. . .”. I can imagine quite a lot, but I can’t out-imagine God’s abilities, or His love, or His gifts for me!

It’s like at Christmas, when you ask your parents for a matchbox truck; a small toy, an inch or two long. Imagine your surprise on Christmas morning when instead you unwrap a remote control, three foot long eighteen wheeler, with working headlights and horn.

We ask for matchboxes – God gives us Eighteen Wheelers! No matter what we expect from Him, He always goes above and beyond anything we could ask for or imagine.

Ain’t that wonderful.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go shark hunting in the pool.

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My Journey- Machine Gun Nests and Weight Loss

imagesWhy wasn’t there a machine gun nest near the tree? Seriously! If there was, when Eve approached and a line of bullets cut into the ground in front of her, warning her to back off, she wouldn’t have eaten the forbidden fruit.

That’s how I feel on my diet. If only there was a machine gun nest. . . 

I pray, “Lord, stop me from overeating,” as if I want Him to create an electrified refrigerator door handle that would zap me whenever I touched it. “Lord, give me the strength to get up and exercise,” as if I’m a robot that God simply moves around; bending my arms and legs, kind of like Gumby. Remember those little toy Gumbies? You could move their arms and legs; that is, until the wire in the inside broke. Then they kind of flopped around. Sometimes I feel like my prayers are Gumby-ish.  “Lord, stop me from sinning. Stop me from overeating.”

Let’s look at the truth of the matter. Just like Joshua exhorted the nation of Israel – “Choose you this day who you will serve. . .”, God says the same thing to me. Only it’s “Choose you this day what you will eat. . .”

When I pray, “God, help me! Be with me. Lord give me strength,”  He answers with an already given (and constantly being fulfilled) promise, “Lo, I am with you always!”

Hey! I’m not saying God doesn’t answer prayers. He does. However, for any of us to act like a Gumby and expect God to stop us from sinning, to want a heavenly electric shock collar, it’s not the way it works.

God didn’t put a machine gun nest in the garden. He didn’t put a electric fence around the tree. Adam and Eve made choices. God is with me while I am on this weight loss journey, but He’s not Gumby-ing me. My choices got me into this mess. It’s gotta be my choices that get me out. Every day it’s, “Choose you this day. . .”

Another six pounds down. Hurray!

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My First Week

imagesWell friend, it’s time to report on my first week of dieting. Before we get to the numbers, let me take this opportunity to thank everyone for their prayers and support. They truly mean a lot to me. Part way through the week, a friend shot me a quick message, encouraging me. I can’t express how blessed I was by that.

1 Thessalonians 5:11 Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

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Now for the big announcement. How much did I lose? Drum roll please. (This is where you strum your fingers on the desk top or table or the side of your head, whatever suits you best.)

I lost three pounds this week.

Wait, wait. I can see you scratching your heads and saying, Huh? You realize that at my weight, I am capable of greater numbers than this. You were expecting maybe in the double digits. Let me say, I agree with you. And to add, not as an excuse or a reason, but in explanation, it was a difficult week for my wife and I. We were constantly on the go, which meant a ton of eating out. I take full responsibility for my actions.

I guess one of the things I need to learn is to make healthier choices when dining at restaurants. Of course the better lesson is– Don’t eat at Restaurants! At least not on a regular basis.

But the good news is, I didn’t gain! I did lose something.

Keep the faith. Keep praying for me. I was touched by the well wishes and encouragement. Next week, we’ll see some better results.

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But is it Good for You???

Every once in a while, God zings you with an undeniable message. This was the case several years ago when He used my son Jerry to teach me a lesson. The kid must have been around ten years old. We were sitting together, watching television, when a show came on that had questionable content. Don’t ask me what it was; bad language, sexual stuff. . . I don’t remember.

All I can tell you, it shouldn’t have been viewed by children. “Son, you’re gonna have to leave. You shouldn’t watch this. It’s not meant for children. It’s not good for you.”

Jerry didn’t argue. I continued watching, as he got up. As he left the room, he asked, “Dad, if it’s not good for me to watch, why is it good for you?”

That was the zinger. I thought about it. Really thought about it. Much to my dismay, the kid was right. It wasn’t good for me to watch, either.

You may argue, “Hey! You’re an adult. You can handle it.” But think about it– Watching a show that portrays and belittles women as sex objects, that glorifies violence, that is filled with profane language. . . Is it truly good for you to see? Watching a show that portrays abnormal as normal, should you be filling your head with this? You may say you can handle it (Based on the rising number of sex offenders and the moral decay of our culture, I somewhat doubt that), but is it good for you?

For my Christian reader, I add, Does it glorify God?

Have we swallowed the term Adult Theme in exchange for vulgarity, crudeness, and soft porn? Don’t fool yourself. Don’t think because our culture says something is all right for an adult to view, that it is.

I believe, for a Christian, it’s also a matter of obedience to God.  Philippians 4:8. Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

My son taught me a lesson that day. What I view, what I read, it truly does effect who I am. It matters. So now, when I’m going to watch something, or read something that is of questionable taste, I relive a version of that scene with my son- Only now, instead of me being the dad, I’m the child. My Heavenly Father stands beside me. He says, “Child, you shouldn’t be watching that. It’s not good for you.”

Am I willing to listen? Are you willing to listen?

Psalm 101:2-3. I will be careful to lead a blameless life—when will you come to me? I will conduct the affairs of my house with a blameless heart. 3 I will not look with approval on anything that is vile. I hate what faithless people do; I will have no part in it.

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Weight Loss– The Journey Begins

 

imagesThose of you who know me, know that I’m a rather large man. I’m not bragging, nor complaining. Just stating the facts as they are. I’d put myself in the top ten per cent of large guys, worldwide. This might not be something that a person would normally blog about. I don’t know. Is there a norm; a yardstick to measure blog posts. Anyways, I had an idea.

Recently, I’ve been inspired by friends who have lost weight. I’ve also had a difficult summer, with my weight contributing to some health problems.

SHHH!!! Please don’t tell my wife. She’ll just worry. 

It’s time. Time to make some changes. What does this have to do with my blog, you may ask? I’m going to set a goal for the amount of weight I want to lose before Christmas. Then, on a weekly basis, I’ll give you an update on my progress; maybe some insights I’ve gained.

What do I seek from you? 

-Prayer and Support

-Advice, if you have any to give

-Encouragement

-Maybe, you have some weight to lose and would like to join me on the journey. Feel free to post your goals. I’ll be praying for you!

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Well. . .here we go. Choosing a goal is not easy. I don’t want to make it too high, then get discouraged when I don’t reach it. I don’t want to make it too low and reach it in a couple of weeks. I also have to keep in mind the amount of weight (overall) that I need to lose, and on top of that, we’re coming into the fall/winter months. Historically, that’s when I gain weight.

NO! NO! Don’t think of those things! Set a goal and stick to it.

Okay. I would like to lose fifty pounds by Christmas. There! I said it.

Friends, your next update will be on Saturday, September 14th.

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Support AGWLWJLLBDNSITOBMWGM!!

 

how_to_draw_a_roseHere’s what happened. I was at a store, buying some fake flowers. Being the bright wit that I am, I pulled out a plastic rose. “Would you accept this rose from me?” I asked the cashier; my tribute to the ceremony of a certain reality show.

 

“No,” she said. ” I am a Lesbian!” She over-pronounced every word.

I was taken back. Not because she was a Lesbian, but because she seemed offended at my little joke.

“Oh. . . Okay.” I turned my attention to my wallet, figuring our conversation was over. But she wasn’t done. “That means.” She puffed out her chest and said loud enough for everyone in the line to hear. “I like girls.”

“Uh-huh.” When had I entered the Twilight Zone?

“My girlfriend wouldn’t be happy with me if I took your rose.” It was as if she were on a One-Lesbian Crusade to jam her beliefs down my throat.

I honestly didn’t know how to respond to this. Was she trying to educate me or was she simply punishing me for buying cheap, fake flowers? I wanted out of the awkward conversation, and the store.

She had more truth bombs to drop, though. “I. . .” She glared at me.”. . . have sex with girls.” Then she gave a triumphant look and handed me my change. I walked away, wondering what in the world that was all about.

Who proclaims their sexual acts in a crowded store? 

I have to tell you, what bothered me most was, I had no witty comeback; nothing to put this very strange cashier in her place. I laid in bed that night, festering on this. Then it hit me– A LIGHT BULB MOMENT–I had my comeback.

It was about one a.m., so who could I share my revelation with? I gazed over in the darkness, at the sleeping lump next to me. My wife. She wouldn’t mind me waking her up.

A gentle nudge. . . Nothing. . .A harder push. Luckily, she keeps her side of the bed tucked in and wouldn’t fall out.

Finally, she stirred and spoke; muffled and half asleep. “You okay?”

“Honey. I think I’m a Lesbian.”

My wife sighed. Why does she always sigh? “You’re not a Lesbian”

“But. . .” I explained my encounter in the store, telling her all the points that the odd woman had shared.

“So?”

“Well, she told me she likes girls. I like girls, too.”

“Oh, really? How many girls do you like?”

“Just you, sweetie.”

“Lucky me. You’re not a Lesbian,” she answered, flatly.

“But I have a girlfriend. At least I did. But we’re married now.”

“Jerry. . .”

“And!” I pointed a triumphant finger up into the darkness. “We’ve got six kids. It says something about us and. . .er s-e-x.” I nodded. “That’s what I should have said to that crazy girl. I’m a Lesbian, too. That would have freaked her out.”

“Go to sleep.” I could tell by the tone of her voice that my wife had already tuned me out and was trying to drift back into sleepy-land.

“Besides,” I said. “I hear the government is doing a study, trying to figure out why 80 per cent of Lesbians are fat. I’m fat.”

I could hear my wife’s eyes rolling around. “Lesbians are women. You are not a woman.”

I fell silent. She had me there. She turned away from me. After a minute, I said, “Maybe I’m one of those people who goes to jail so they can get free sex change operations.”

“Jerry!”

“Maybe I’m one of those people who go by a long list of letters like the LGB. . .” I faltered, trying to remember the rest. “But I’m a GWLWJLLBDNSITOBMWGM.” I waited for her to ask me what that stood for, but she wasn’t biting. “Okay. I’ll tell you. That’s a A GUY WHO LIKES WOMEN, JUST LIKE LESBIANS, BUT DOES NOT SAY IT TOO OFTEN BECAUSE MY WIFE GETS MAD.”

No response. How come my wife wasn’t laughing? This is good stuff. 

“Do you know what confuses me?” I asked. “That Bono kid. Sonny and Chers’. . .He/she was a Lesbian, but had a sex change operation. Now she. . .he’s a guy. So was he never a Lesbian? I mean he’s a guy who likes girls, just like me. I am so confused.”

“Good night, Jerry.”

I sighed. “Good night.” As my wife fell back asleep, I said, “Don’t forget to support  AGWLWJLLBDNSITOBMWGM pride day.”

Before I get email from my Christian friends, telling me I am insane, and/or from my more liberal readers, telling me I crossed a line, think of this– The story in the store really happened. Out of the clear blue and in front of all kinds of people, some crazy militant cashier had to proclaim what she was, and what she did. That, my friends is what you should be offended at.

 

 

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The Harvest and Jelly Beans

DownloadedFileMatthew 9:37-38   Then He said to His disciples, “The harvest truly is plentiful, but the laborers are few. Therefore pray the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into His harvest.”

Sometimes Christians can get a negative mind set, where we see the end of the world, doom & gloom, and hopelessness around every corner. Take the above mentioned verse. I’ve heard people utter it as if it were a terrible thing. Imagine a glum, end of the world person, moaning, “The harvest is plentiful BUT the laborers are few. Oh my! What are we going to do? The laborers are few. Then they give a sad shake of their head, kind of like Lurch on the old Adams Family TV show.

Recently, I stopped by at a youth camp to visit some friends of mine. I had the opportunity to sit in on a class. One teen complained about the lack of Christians in his school. “I only know a handful,” he said. Some of the others gave sad shakes to their heads.

First of all, I kind of doubt what he was saying. I’m not calling him a liar, simply misinformed. I will admit, though, that I could be wrong on that.

But, there’s a bigger truth here. Let’s take the teen at his word– There are only a hand full of Christians in his school. There are Christians, all around, who moan and complain about the same thing “I have no Christian friends. Oh, woe is me.”

So what’s anyone doing about it?

Let me try and illustrate a wonderful truth.

I’m going to come visit you and I’m bringing your favorite candy. Let’s say. . . jelly beans. When I visit, you’re planning on having a few friends over. There’ll be five of you, in all. I’m bringing 500 jelly beans. Wow! A lot of candy! Plenty to go around.

Let’s change the scenario. Lets say you have fifty friends coming over. Hey! You’re a pretty popular person. I’m going to bring 100 jelly beans. . . Uh-oh.

Which scenario do you like better? Come on! Admit it. The first. You want to pig out on jelly beans. (Personally I like the black ones. If they’re jelly bellies, my next favorites are juicy pear and root beer. Just in case someone wants to bring me a bag.)

The potential for jelly bean consumption is greater in the first scenario, isn’t it? Five hundred jelly beans and five people?

Let’s look back at Jesus’ words, in light of the potential for working towards the great commission.

The harvest is PLENTIFUL. A lot of people! A lot of potential Christians!! Be excited. There are tons of people who need to hear God’s word!

It’s like I came to your house with a billion ga-zillion jelly beans!

Black ones, juicy pear, tangerine. Even popcorn (though I find something odd about popcorn jelly beans.) Every flavor you could imagine. The jelly bean harvest is great. If the laborers are few, then there’s more for me! Wahoo!!

In spiritual terms, instead of bemoaning the lack of workers, roll up your sleeves. The harvest is great. There is more opportunities for you to shine! More opportunities to have God pronounce, “Well done!” Look to the fields. The potential is incredible. Let’s get to work!

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Support BCF!

DownloadedFileMy wife and I have had a busy summer, visiting some of our children and new born grandkids. During our travels I came across the subject of this blog; a terrible disease, afflicting countless millions. I hope I can count on you to support my new foundation – the BCF.   The Boneless Chicken Foundation

I discovered this dreaded disease, while visiting several restaurants during our trip. Every menu had boneless chicken on it. I want you to join me in imagining the tragic life of these genetically needy, brave birds– Born with no bones!!!

Visualize the little chicks, helplessly lying in the coop, not able to even raise their heads; watching the other birds scampering about, pecking at seeds, while they lay, powerless; a tear rolling down the side of their face. No bones!!!

What Can You Do?

Currently, I’ve assembled a think tank, a group of the greatest minds in our country, to determine the best course of action to help our fowl friends. Here are some of our thoughts-

1. Tiny motorized wheel chairs, perhaps with special little baskets fitted under them for catching eggs. After all, even Boneless Chickens want to feel productive.

2. Exoskeletons may be the way to go. What a wonderful world it would be with a whole fleet of robo-chickens marching about.

3. Specially trained BCF helper dogs. Can’t you just see our brave little friends strapped to the back of a purebred German Shepherds.

Also, We’re looking for a Poster Chicken. So if, in your travels, you come across a Boneless Chicken lying on the side of the road, don’t mock him. Don’t run him over. Call me!

I’ve contacted some Animal Rights groups, pleading my cause. For some reason, they hang up on me. One individual scoffed, before slamming down the receiver. I suspect this is a result of influence from the powerful Fried Chicken lobby in Washington.

In closing, may I once again plead for you to help out! Imagine this– A young bird, sprawled against the ground, not able to lift a wing to defend himself when Colonel Sanders’ men come along.

Doesn’t it just break your heart to think of them lying there, watching helplessly as the other chickens cross the road. Moving their tiny beaks. One weak, agonizing word clucks out– “Why?”

 

For those who’ve read my blog in the past, and are waiting for some important Christian message. . .sorry. Nothing here. It’s summer. Just wanted to do something fun.

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